Communication
Listening and Paraphrasing – Communication Bookends
“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and to be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.” Ralph Nichols Paraphrasing is the skill that is evidence we have listened. It is the skill that feeds the human need Nichols speaks of in the quotation above. When we…
Read MoreMoving “Listen For” to a Paraphrase
The ezine this month concluded with the reminder of what we “Listen For”: What the person wants Emotion Passion Options, possibilities, potential What is already working Reframes Negative to Positive Problem to Solution Complaint to Commitment Now, let’s put “listen for” together with paraphrasing which we learned in our first book. We learned three kinds of…
Read MoreKeep Calm And …
Listen First So many times we “think” we know what someone else is thinking or feeling, including the impetus or motivation for her actions. In our fast-paced lives, we often skip the part about truly listening to discover the reality about someone else’s thoughts, what really motivated her actions, and how she might be feeling…
Read MoreAn Attitude of Gratitude
Holding on to an attitude of gratitude is like holding on to a trusted friend. It will always lead you to a better place. We at RCG are grateful for the privilege of working with dedicated school leaders from across this country – people just like you. As Thanksgiving approaches – here are a few…
Read MoreBeing a Coach Leader
“Many people think we can think for other people, yet when it comes to the way we process information, our brains are dramatically different. What we think another person should be doing is what OUR brain might do, which is very unlikely to be the right idea for another person.” (David Rock, Quiet Leadership, 2006)…
Read MoreHow Do We Move From Asking to Action
One of my favorite radio programs is Wait, Wait Don’t Tell Me. Each week the show’s producers select several listeners for each show and call them to appear on the program, playing various games featuring questions based on the week’s news. In most cases, the contestants receive a bit of latitude in getting the correct…
Read MoreThe Question of the Grandmother
“Sooner or later, like it or not, you’ll be faced with challenging questions – so why not get in the habit of asking them sooner?” -Warren Berger As a coach leader, I never tire of hearing those four little words, “That’s a good question.” Coaches are often asked, “How do you know what questions to…
Read MoreFrom Sabotage to Service: Your Mind At Work
You’re productively engaged in your day, with an overall sense of well-being. You glance up to see a colleague at your door appearing frustrated. She references a recent email of yours and says it has inaccuracies. She wants to talk with you, as do three other colleagues waiting with her. What do you do? Let’s…
Read MoreLanguage of Leaders to Others and Self
Great leaders are great leaders because of their ability to support and influence others to achieve more than believed or thought possible. Leaders use their knowledge, skills and language to guide, scaffold, motivate and inspire. David Rock writes that every action, every decision made by a leader either supports or undermines the perceived level of…
Read MoreWho You Gonna Be?
Recently I’ve been listening to a lot of music by singer-songwriter-coach Barbara McAfee. Some lyrics I love to reference with leaders are from a song entitled, Who You Gonna Be? Here are the lyrics. Who you gonna be while do what you do? How’re gonna show up when you’re passin’ through? I’m livin’ in this…
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