Ways to Blab Less
Summer Reading Connections – Part III
The last author, Dan, from Saturday Solutions offered a catchy title: Clarity without Blabbing. It caught my eye for the very reason that a reflective leader was working on self-assessment and decided he wanted to blab less and so he wrote Dan requesting some strategies. He was very wise in recognizing that he had a great team and that his over communicating must be very frustrating. The column author, Dan, responded with some very insightful information. What follows is an authentic response to what may seem humorous, and yet very important for a very unproductive pattern of communication.
First, Dan commended the leader for being self-aware and desiring to explore the power of piping down. Then he offered three reasons leaders become blabbers.
- Position, authority, and responsibility loosen lips. The person with the highest job title usually talks the most.
- Concern about unnecessary mistakes makes leaders jaw-flappers. It feels safer to say too much than too little. Talkative leaders are protecting people from wasting time and resources.
- Experience with people who nod in agreement, even when they’re confused, invites windy leaders to talk more.
As we read the above, no doubt a person or two may come to mind – even ourselves. Ouch!
And here are the recommendations made for us – “sometime blabbers.”
1 – Set a positive goal: (for example) “I will be an effective concise communicator, not simply talking less. I will seek clarity and brevity.”
2 – Prepare: Leaders with the gift of gab need to prepare more than quiet introverts. It takes more preparation to speak effectively for a short time than for a long time.
- With a project in mind, make a complete list of every topic you want to address.
- Rank the items on your list in order of importance. Which items could be eliminated or combined? Start with big stuff.
- Craft one or two sentences for each important item. Don’t begin with ad
3 – Leverage Relationships:
- Include others in your development. Be transparent with your goal. It will set an example and strengthen connections.
- Ask team members, “What suggestions do you have that might help me communicate with brevity and clarity?”
- Explain the goal
- Ask for suggestions
- Dig into their ideas
- Put one idea into practice during the next meeting.
- Give a project to your team members. Explain your goal. Ask them to give you a knowing nod when they feel you’ve provided enough clarity. If you want to have fun, let them create the signal to you.
- Seek feedback from team members regularly. (especially after meetings). Ask three questions:
- What did I do that provided enough clarity?
- What was I doing when I talked too long?
- How might I communicate with brevity and clarity?
- Ask team members, “What suggestions do you have that might help me communicate with brevity and clarity?”
What a cool way for a leader to model self-awareness and self-assessment. Great leaders know that talking too long invites confusion, not clarity. Another reminder of how important it is to be authentic and always desire to “be” our best self.