Coaching Skills
How Do You Feel?
How do you feel? How many times in your life has someone asked you that question? And, how clear were you on articulating how you were feeling? As a child, I’m not certain how I was taught to express my feelings. Sure, I knew to say, “That hurt my feelings.” Or “That makes me mad.”…
Read MoreVertical Coaching
What is vertical coaching? In Coach the Person, Not the Problem, Marcia Reynolds describes vertical coaching as transformational. She defines horizontal coaching as transactional. What is the difference? Transactional coaching stays at the tip of the iceberg, focusing only on results or behaviors. It is about the client deciding what to do or not do…
Read MoreUncovering the Real Challenge
Much of what is called “coaching” is advising or going for the easy “fix” or solution that seems obvious to the coach. What we continue to learn and be ever more mindful of are the dynamics that are hidden beneath the surface. The very fact that they are hidden makes them invisible both to coach…
Read MoreIt’s A Brené Brown Thing!
“I always wanted to be somebody. I should have been more specific.” Lily Tomlin While Lily Tomlin adds a little levity to the notion of being really clear about what we want, her quote also suggests the importance of being clear about our own roles and responsibilities when coaching others. Those who are in our…
Read MoreEthics – A Standard with Whom We are Familiar – Or Are We?
“Ethics is knowing the difference between what you have a right to do and what is right to do.” –Potter Stewart How true is this statement? Ethics is a standard with whom we are all familiar. My experience as an educator and coach says not so much! Only when there is an infraction or someone…
Read MoreGive the Present of Presence
Most likely we would not be too excited to open a gift and find nothing inside. Right? However, would you be surprised to know that in coaching, this is the perfect metaphor for coaching presence? Let me explain. In coaching, we are giving the gift of ourselves and our skills to another person. What does…
Read MoreCoaching Presence – What is it and Why is it Important?
Earlier this month, I offered some thoughts about the behaviors of a coach-leader and of a coach, showing how in many ways both roles are similar and at times different. One important way that coach leaders and coaches are the same is the way they offer and maintain presence to the person speaking. In order…
Read MorePsychological Safety, Part 2
William Kahn describes psychological safety as “being able to show and employ one’s self without fear of negative consequences of self-image, status or career.” Psychological Conditions of Personal Engagement and Disengagement at Work. In the previous post, the first two stages of psychological safety were discussed — Inclusion Safety and Learner Safety. The next stages…
Read MorePsychological Safety
Timothy R. Clark, in his book The 4 Stages of Psychological Safety, defines psychological safety as a condition in which you feel (1) included, (2) safe to learn, (3) safe to contribute, and (4) safe to challenge the status quo—all without fear of being embarrassed, marginalized, or punished in some way. Clark states that psychological…
Read MoreMake the Most of Yourself – Get Involved with Coaching
“The very best thing you can do for the whole world is to make the most of yourself.” Wallace Wattles I love this quote which I came across while reading The Heart of Laser-Focused Coaching by Marion Franklin (2019). Making the most of yourself. Isn’t that what coaching is really all about – supporting another…
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