Listening
Listen For . . . Second Dimension
“When a quality listener listens, they listen to people and believe in others completely. They encourage and support others in being the best they can be, just in how they listen, without saying a word.” David Rock While the two previous articles in this series have offered a “sneak peek” from our second book into…
Read MoreListening and Paraphrasing – Communication Bookends
“The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and to be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them.” Ralph Nichols Paraphrasing is the skill that is evidence we have listened. It is the skill that feeds the human need Nichols speaks of in the quotation above. When we…
Read MoreBeing a Coach Leader
“Many people think we can think for other people, yet when it comes to the way we process information, our brains are dramatically different. What we think another person should be doing is what OUR brain might do, which is very unlikely to be the right idea for another person.” (David Rock, Quiet Leadership, 2006)…
Read MoreThe Power of LOVE
Henry David Thoreau said, “Do what you love to do. Know your own bone; gnaw at it, bury it, unearth it, and gnaw it more.” February is the LOVE month and it offers a reminder to show and tell the people we love that we do. Typically we think of loved ones – sweethearts, kids,…
Read MoreWhat Do You Listen For?
We have been listening since we were born—even longer than we have been speaking. We have years of forming habits about listening, based on input from family, personality of close adults, positive/negative recognition or attention, nonverbal communication patterns, and “do” or “don’t” messages. These socialization processes result in our listening through filters. These are some…
Read MoreListening WITH
Just as there is a distinction between “listening TO” and “listening FOR”, there is also a distinction between either of these and “listening WITH”. As we listen WITH an open mind and the intent to understand, it becomes impossible to judge or criticize another. Listening WITH requires full presence–mind, body, and heart. When we listen…
Read MoreWake Up Joy
“It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creative expression and knowledge.” Albert Einstein Wake up Joy. You have fallen asleep and are waiting for inspiration to nudge you and bring you back to life. Inspiration enters in the form of a dedicated teacher. He looks at you and smiles. He…
Read MoreListening for the Sounds of Spring
With this unusually severe winter in the Midwest, I’ve been very intent on listening for any subtle signs of the approaching spring. The other day I heard a gaggle of geese flying overhead and watched them descend on ice floes in the lake. Another day, I heard an unseen woodpecker tapping out the message that…
Read MoreFeedback That Works
This time of the year is heavy on feedback in our systems; summative evaluations, performance reviews, contract renewals; all bring levels of stress to the receiver as well as the giver. The vast majority of the feedback given is to people who are doing great work and good work – it’s so easy to say…
Read MoreWhat Makes Feedback So Hard?
We all know that feedback is the key to growth. It shouldn’t be so hard for us, after all humans are wired for learning. We are learning from the minute we are born and hopefully until we leave this earth. Aha…oh, yes, easy to learn but to learn about me? Now, you are getting personal!…
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